I will offer some things that no one told me at this phase but I dearly wish they would have!!! She will still need you. Only it will be different. I think I was under the impression that they fly off out of the nest and that is it!! Mothering is over.... I will say- IT IS most definitely not over.
You will feel your heart strings stretch farther than ever before as she travels far away. You get to figure out if you will be bringing your phone into your room at night now. SEND CARE PACKAGES! I absolutely LOVE doing this and it makes me feel so much more connected and like I am still able to tap in to know their fave snacks, keep them healthy with elderberry gummies, electrolytes, toothpaste ect... I decorate the heck out of the box, too... ;-) Show up for important events on campus- family weekend, performances, ect. She will feel a gap if you are not there.
I have watched time fly through the 4 years of college and I know now how important this time is for kids to find their voice and their own beacon. I also know the kids that do the best have a strong support system at home cheering them on, still showing up and supporting the intense and beautiful journey that is college. That's it. A nuanced mix of "give the appropriate amount of space for her to grow" and still show up with a full loving heart. nbd. lol
Ok, one more thing. Give yourself space to grieve and then fill that space with taking care of you in new ways!
Exactly this Radha! She and are very clear and committed to my continued mothering of her (and the boys) for the rest of life. When I moved out I felt like I was completely severed from any parenting and wow have I longed to be parented, these past 30 years! Thank you for this. I am inspired to lean into my care package game. xxx,m
Oh mama.... I HEAR THIS.
I will offer some things that no one told me at this phase but I dearly wish they would have!!! She will still need you. Only it will be different. I think I was under the impression that they fly off out of the nest and that is it!! Mothering is over.... I will say- IT IS most definitely not over.
You will feel your heart strings stretch farther than ever before as she travels far away. You get to figure out if you will be bringing your phone into your room at night now. SEND CARE PACKAGES! I absolutely LOVE doing this and it makes me feel so much more connected and like I am still able to tap in to know their fave snacks, keep them healthy with elderberry gummies, electrolytes, toothpaste ect... I decorate the heck out of the box, too... ;-) Show up for important events on campus- family weekend, performances, ect. She will feel a gap if you are not there.
I have watched time fly through the 4 years of college and I know now how important this time is for kids to find their voice and their own beacon. I also know the kids that do the best have a strong support system at home cheering them on, still showing up and supporting the intense and beautiful journey that is college. That's it. A nuanced mix of "give the appropriate amount of space for her to grow" and still show up with a full loving heart. nbd. lol
Ok, one more thing. Give yourself space to grieve and then fill that space with taking care of you in new ways!
Love you mama... XO
Exactly this Radha! She and are very clear and committed to my continued mothering of her (and the boys) for the rest of life. When I moved out I felt like I was completely severed from any parenting and wow have I longed to be parented, these past 30 years! Thank you for this. I am inspired to lean into my care package game. xxx,m